Look Into My Eyes
by Cul8tr
Summary: A closed book. Never open. Letting someone in. They hurt you. I can't read you. No one can. BBxRae WARNING: Language ahead.
1. It

**AN: I do not own Teen Titans.**

Chapter One

'It'. It seemed to take control over her, and she couldn't control it. 'It' makes her tremble in fear at the sound of 'It's' name.

Raven brought her legs to her chest and gazed around her dark room. How could she be so creepy? No, it wasn't her, it was 'It'. Raven's thought rushed around her head, causing a terrible headache. But she did not want to get up. Not now, not ever. She wasn't herself, and she never would be. 'It' can escape by one slip on the tongue.

She needed to go. She couldn't let 'It' escape and endanger her teammates. She couldn't let that happened. She summoned a suitcase in her powers and let her mind do all the work. After all, she had no control over it.

Beast Boy looked at his controller, battling Cyborg at video games wasn't so fun anymore. Raven had always been there to make sarcastic remarks when he got angry when he lost. And every time, he'd wait. Wait for Raven to say something. But what he heard, was dead silence. You never how much you appreciate someone until you lose them. He sighed and set down the controller.

"Man, you're that upset?" asked Cyborg. "I know you cry but you never actually left a game before."

"My eyes hurt." said Beast Boy. Honestly, he didn't really want to play without Raven there. It felt like jail, almost.

"B., we played for 12 hours straight once," said Cyborg. "What's wrong? Afraid you're going to lose for the twentieth time?"

"Yeah," lied Beast Boy. "I know you're the best player in the entire world, and no matter what I do, how long I play, how many cheats I use, you're gonna win. I'm done."

"Done?" asked Cyborg, asking himself over and over if Beast Boy was telling the truth. Never had he said that, and never have he admitted defeat. "What the hell is the matter with you man?"

"Didn't you hear me?" asked Beast Boy. "I said 'I'm done' and I am. I admitted defeat and you're the grand master. I don't care anymore." He left the room and his head seemed to hurt. What the hell was the matter with him? He never felt so many emotions at much. If only Raven said something.

Raven finished packing and looked at her window, for it was the last time she would ever see this place. The last time she would ever live here. The last time she would see her only friends.

She encased a book in her powers and stared at the cover, her head began to hurt immensely and she knew what was happening, 'It' was taking control of her again.

"_You are a closed book. Never open. You let someone in and they ended up hurting you. So you closed yourself. You may look fine on the outside, but you're a wreck on the inside. I can't read you. No one can_."

Raven's suitcase exploded open and she gasped, she sighed and began packing up by hand, she had no reason to use her powers, for it would cause death threats to everyone. She was no person, she was a half-demon, possessed by a full demon. She was monster.

A knock came from her door and she sighed, for she did not want to see anyone. She could kill anyone with one wrong move. "You do not want to come in, I will put you in danger."

"I'll take the risk. I shouldn't be alive anyway," Beast Boy entered her room and closed the door behind him. He walked over to her bed without saying a word and covered his eyes.

"What's wrong with you?" asked Raven.

"Shitty day, as usual," replied Beast Boy. "Being an empath, I bet you know why."

"Actually no," acknowledged Raven. "I haven't been able to feel anything in the past few months. So an explanation is necessary."

"Wait, so for months you haven't been able to feel a single emotion?" asked Beast Boy. "Is that why you never come out of your room? Only for tea and missions?"

"No." said Raven, wanting to change the subject. "Now, we may talk about your day."

"I don't think so Raven." announced Beast Boy. "What are you hiding? Why you never come out of your room? Why can't you feel anything?"

"That's none of your fucking business." said Raven. "You can go out of my room now."

Beast Boy grunted and gave up, he was going to get nowhere arguing with her. He turned to her clothes on the floor and raised a brow. "What's up with all the clothes on the floor?"

"I'm leaving." said Raven simply.

"What? You can't leave! Why do you want to?" asked Beast Boy.

"You seemed interested," said Raven. "I'm leaving because I'm endangering you—everyone. I'm sorry."

"That's you story?" said Beast Boy, getting infuriated. "You can't just leave just because you think you're endangering everyone. That's just bullshit!"

"I'm leaving Beast Boy," affirmed Raven. "It's for the best. In the end, you'll thank me."

"I won't be thanking you cuz you're not leaving." said Beast Boy. "I forbid you to leave. You're not leaving, ever."

"You cannot make me do something I don't want to do." said Raven. "I'm leaving, and it's settled."

"Fine." said Beast Boy. "I shouldn't throw you into something you don't wanna do but if you're going to stay, stay forever. If you're going to leave, then do it today. If you're going to change, change for the better. And if you're going to talk, then mean what you say."

Raven put her hand her head, it was happening, 'It' was possessing her. She wrapped her bookcase in her powers and lifted it up in the air, her eyes black in fear, she grunted and the bookcase was thrown at Beast Boy. He quickly moved out the way and gasped.

"Raven, stop!" he yelled. Beast boy ran over to her and put his hand on her shoulders. "Take deep breaths... just calm down."

Raven's eyes returned to its original state and she collapsed in his arms. He cursed silently and just then, Robin, Cyborg, and Starfire became rushing over.

"What the hell happened?" asked Robin.

"I don't know…" said Beast Boy, still in shock. "She just… I can't…"

"Cyborg, take Raven to Med Bay, Starfire, go with him. I have to talk to Beast Boy." said Robin. Cyborg took Raven and Starfire followed.

"What happened?" asked Robin as they left. "What the hell did you? Why is Raven's room a mess?"

"I told you… I don't know." said Beast Boy. "Just leave me alone. I want to go see Raven."

"You're not going anywhere until I get an explanation." affirmed Robin, blocking his path.

"Get the fuck out of my way." said Beast Boy, feeling infuriated with everything right now.

"No." said Robin simply. "You're not getting away that easy. This will go on your record for disobeying orders."

"I don't care. You can't tell me what to do." said Beast Boy. He was worried about Raven, what was wrong with her? And his leader was blocking his path. What kind of leader was he anyway? "Are you going to move now?"

"No. Now you're being disrespectful." said Robin. "You're not ever going to be allowed 200 feet within this tower if you don't spill."

"I'm not going to say it again," said Beast Boy, his knuckles burned in anger. Get. The fuck. Out of my way."

"No." said Robin.

That was it, Beast Boy lunged at Robin and tackled him, Beast Boy got on top of him and started the beating the shit of him, and hell, he sure did deserved it.

"Get the fuck off of me!" yelled Robin, and threw of few punches himself. Robin threw one more punch and Beast Boy fell backwards. Robin reached into his utility belt and brought out handcuffs. He threw Beast Boy on his back and handcuffed him. "If you don't stop, I will call the police." affirmed Robin.

"Don't you fucking dare!" yelled Beast Boy.

"Then _stop_." said Robin.

Beast Boy sighed and gave up. "Fine." Never had he gotten so angry. But Robin deserved a more brutal beaten than that. But he was already blackmailed. Might as well give up.


	2. Getaway

**AN: I do not own Teen Titans.**

Chapter Two

It wasn't clear. Not at all. What had happened? Did she lose control? Did 'It' take control of her? Raven tried lifting up her arm but it feel numb. She couldn't feel a thing. She panicked and wondered if she was in jail. Did her friends find out? She gazed around the room worriedly and sighed. She was just in Med Bay, no harm done. None that she knew of that is.

"Friend Raven?" peeped Starfire, she hugged a notebook to her chest and frowned for her friend. "Are you awake?"

Raven tried to speak, but no sound came out. She began to panic. Did they give her some kind of medicine to lose her voice? Laryngitis, perhaps. Her heart monitor began to beep loudly and Starfire called out to her friend cautiously. "Robin! Cyborg! Something is wrong with Raven!"

Cyborg and Robin burst through the door in fear. She seemed fine just a second ago.

"What's wrong?" asked Robin.

"For when I was taking notes, she awoken." said Starfire, her eyes welling up in tears. "I simply asked her if she was awake and she didn't respond. That's when her monitor when the crazy! I fear I have done something wrong."

"No, you didn't." said Cyborg, checking his computer. "She's just cautious. I don't think she remembers anything. Just give her time. She'll come back."

"Alright," sniffed Starfire, wiping her tears away. "I am very worried."

"We all are Star," said Robin, and put his hand on her shoulders. "Let's leave her alone now." The three exited the room and left her alone.

Raven's head began to hurt again, and 'It' took control of her mind. "_You are the girl who seemed unbreakable, broke. You dropped a fake smile and whispered to yourself. 'You can't do this anymore'_"

Raven ripped all the cords off her and dropped to the floor. She hated 'It'. She despised 'It'. Every day, 'It' would possess more and more of Raven until he got what he wanted. And once he had it, 'It' would kill each and every human being. But they would not know it was 'It' they would think it's her. And she would be sentence to death. Sometimes, Raven wondered why she was even living.

Beast Boy tossed and turned around in this white room he was in, he was very angry and wanted the beat the living hell out of Robin. "Where is everyone!" he yelled, only to hear himself echo in the room. A door opened to the room, Beast Boy's hands were hurting from being locked up in handcuffs the entire time. And he didn't know what the hell happened. "You." Beast Boy grunted.

"Hello to you too." said Robin, his facial expressions didn't move an inch as he spoke. "Care to tell me what happened, Beast Boy?"

"Why should I tell such a bastard like you?" said Beast Boy. "And take off these fucking handcuffs! I'm not going to kill anyone."

"You promise to tell me what happened?" said Robin. "As I am the team leader, me knowing everything is quite necessary."

"I told you about a million times," acknowledged Beast Boy. "I haven't got a clue. Can you release me now? I'm a teammate. Not a villain."

"Fine." Robin bent down and pulled out a key, he placed in the hole and the handcuffs detached. Beast Boy moved his wrists around and bounced off the floor.

"Where's Raven?" asked Beast Boy.

"Med Bay," said Robin simply. "_Something_ happened to her. And you know why but just won't tell me. I'll ask Starfire and Cyborg to keep you out of there."

"Bastard." muttered Beast Boy. He punched Robin right in the gut and he fell backwards, Beast Boy was satisfied. He'd been yearning to do that.

"Raven?!" exclaimed Beast Boy as he searched Med Bay. She wasn't in the bed, or in her room. "Raven! Can you say something so I know that you're here?"

"Something." came Raven's voice. Beast Boy's keen ears heard her in the room… hiding under a curtain. He went over to the window and lifted up the pale curtain. And there he found Raven, her knees up to her chest and legs were cut and were bleeding. "What do you want?"

"Raven?" asked Beast Boy. "What the hell happened to you? You look terrible."

"I haven't noticed." muttered Raven. "What are you doing here? Didn't Robin—"

"Don't say anymore." said Beast Boy. "It's bad enough he doesn't trust me or believe me. He put me in handcuffs for God's sake."

"Robin's like that, trying to get his nose in everyone's business." said Raven. "He basically spies on us."

"Yeah," agreed Beast Boy. "Anyways, what happened to you? Did you cut yourself? Or maybe you were already like that and I didn't notice.

Raven closed her eyes and hid her face and her head began to hurt painfully she sighed to herself. For she knew what was happening.

'_Wow, Raven, you have more conversations in your head than you do in real life.'_

"Shut up." said Raven uncontrollably, and this made Beast Boy back away, he didn't know that she wasn't talking to him.

"Woah, uh, sorry." apologized Beast Boy. "Didn't mean to offend you or anything."

"Sorry… I overreacted." said Raven. "I'm still figuring out what happened."

"Yeah, Robin's in my face about that," said Beast Boy while rolling his eyes. "I punched him in his gut, guy got knocked out in a matter of seconds."

"Nice." said Raven, but with no emotion. "I can't believe he didn't kick you off the team yet."

"I actually wished he would." said Beast Boy. "It'd be nice to get away from him… for once."

"Actually, maybe _we can_ go out." said Raven. "I'm sick of Med Bay, and you're sick of Robin. So let's get away from them, maybe for a couple of hours. What do you say?"

Beast Boy scratched his head for a few seconds. Tough decision. What if there's a mission and they're not available, but what if Robin's finding him to kick off the team? "Sure. We all need a break."

"Great." Raven swung her cloak around there selves and there were off to wherever.

**AN: Wow, you guys are AWESOME! I was literally spammed with emails for a week about this story. A bunch of favorites and followers. I am so happy! I sort of forgot about this story for a little bit. So excuse the crappiness of this chapter. Thanks guys!**


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